I need an amazing copywriter to compose a quirky email

Topic: Email to bring customers in
Tone: Playful
Extensive research needed: no
Extra notes: I own a graphic design agency and we are wanting to send out our portfolio to potentially new clients. As a agency we receive portfolio emails all the time that are boring and often deleted without fully reading. We want something that is perhaps a little cheeky/playful/witty to grab the attention of the reader, maybe even playing on the "boring email" and telling people they don't want to read on... I'm not sure but completely up to suggestions. Please only send a proposal if you are confident you are a creative writer and can achieve something like this.