I need an improvement to my story cover page

I did a graphic, comic painting, but cannot really paint, that I would l like professionalizing.
See the picture, the description, and the adaption notes below:
Dragons Across the Road
The picture shows a young boy, me, looking out of his bedroom window at night. Across the road is a building within which steam locomotives were repaired. At night these would issue out steam to relieve their boiler pressure, a loud ssshhhh or hiss, (and sometimes the red of the fire box of the engines). The small boy could imagine this was a dragon.
In addition on the hillside, behind the railway works, was a dirty steel plant within which furnaces heat-treated vehicle lorry springs . When the furnace doors opened to pull out the springs the red heat from the furnace glowed and beamed out into the sky. The small boy could imagine these red beams were young dragons opening and closing their eyes.
It is night and dirty industrial smoke is issuing from the factory chimneys. Altogether a hellish vision.
I would like an improved replication of my painting with more emphasis on the dragon image and the red eyes and beams on the hillside behind.
This was a time when coal was the main fuel so everything is grey, dirty and volcanic, and I lived across from the railway and steelworks in Sheffield England.

Slight changes to my painting are:

1 Make the boy a little bigger.
2 The horizontal strip at the bottom which is blue was a grey dirty stone wall at the side of the pavement. I would like some indication, lightly, of the stones in the wall.
3 The Dragon should be more substantial.
4 Immediately above the Dragon the factory roof with three chimneys should not be there. Rather the factory in the top half of the picture should extend down to the Dragon and hence slightly below the middle of the window frame.
5 Include the text or don't. I don't mind either way.