British T-shirt researcher is needed

I'm trying to sell t-shirt in UK market so I need someone to help me get ideas for my t-shirt.

My problem are

1. My English is not so strong. I can communicate but to understand jokes and think of great phrases for t-shirt is above my skill. So, I need someone to think of great t-shirt phrases for me.

2. I don't know what British people do, like and think. In other words, I don't understand the culture very well. So, I need someone to help me get niche for t-shirts.

3. I'm Asian. My fashion taste is completely different with westerners, especially Europeans. So, I need someone to look at my design and tell me if it's good or bad for the specific niche.

Qualification

1. You must be British or live in UK. So, you would understand how UK people think.

2. You are good with fashion. Or, at least you know what people wear.

If you know that you can solve my problem and qualified, please feel free to apply. I'm looking forward working with you.