I need a copywriter with personality to rewrite T&C's/Privacy for new website

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Rachael R.
Cogshed ..Μarina A.Ruth W. have already sent a proposal.
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Description

Experience Level: Expert
Num. of words: 5000
Information for the blog/website: Business is similar to Deliveroo
Industry: Food and Beverage
Num. of web pages: 3
Description of every page: I need someone to rewrite the T&Cs, privacy policy and cookie policy for a client who is launching a new food delivery service. We have taken the current versions from a combination of competitors, and want these to be rewritten so that a) it is unique (i.e. not copied!) and b) it has a bit of personality. Whilst we appreciate these are legal documents, and the legality cannot be diminished in favour of style, we think most T&Cs etc are so dry and wordy that no one would ever read them! So we are looking for someone who can rewrite them in plain English - simply and with a hint of personality (even wit/humour) where possible.

The brand itself is looking to distinguish themselves with their tone of voice, which is very edgy/urban/cool, whilst being sophisticated (we are talking about delivering food from some pretty fancy places). I can send you some other copy examples so you can see what I mean. Whilst we totally appreciate that these docs will inevitably be drier than the rest, we want them to feel like they've come from the same place.

To be clear, this is not a legal job - we have the T&Cs in place. You will need a basic understanding of the terms used on the docs, but we are not looking for a lawyer using a legal thesaurus and throwing as many baffling words/run on sentences at it as possible. We want a copywriter who has a knack for being able to write conversationally - I suppose effortless is the result we're looking for.

A couple of companies that do this well, as an example:

http://legal.hubspot.com/legal-stuff
http://www.ongo.co.uk/legal-stuff/
https://www.wetransfer.com/legal

I actually quite like the way Tumblr has balanced this by adding 'summary sentences' to round up the preceding paragraph in a lighter, easier to digest tone - https://www.tumblr.com/policy/en/terms-of-service. Just an idea you could work with!

Ideally, I would like this work completed by Friday, but I can push to Monday if required.

To apply, please indicate how you would rewrite this sentence according to the brief above:

"We will do our best to deliver your Meal/s in the time we specify. However, Estimated delivery times are only estimates. Neither we nor our Partner Restaurants guarantee that orders will be delivered within the estimated times. The timing of your order is determined according to the volume of orders and the circumstances of the Partner Restaurant when the order is received."
Tone: Witty/Sharp
Outline & Structure: Copy will be provided - you simply need to rewrite according to the brief that has been set.
Extra notes:

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